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The Metaphysical Method Actor




Corinthians 10:13: Unbelief is a common temptation for believers. 
 

A very odd thing happened. I spent years looking into faith and spirituality within my own Christian tradition. A lapsed Catholic, my return to the faith started initially with the usual fervour and enthusiasm of the new convert. A totally new grand narrative had opened up for me. It aimed to answer all moral, philosophical and theological questions. But it seems that faith has taken me to no-faith. It is as if I needed to go through the faith experience in order to trascend it. A metaphysical method actor going through the motions, exploring  the path of faith hesitantly. 

I must clarify that when I talk about faith, I refer to the particular and specific context of faith understood within a mainstream, established religion ( in my case Roman Catholicism). Faith or belief in a God or Supreme Being is another matter. Following any given religion is a two edge sword: on one hand, it offers answers and a path of submission. But on the other hand, it stagnates thought and empathy with the "other", those who don't follow your religion. In the end religion can shackle and imprison the practitioner, who ends up oftentimes trapped within the form of the religion and ignoring the internal, esoteric dimension invariably offered by most or all religions in one way or another. 

Reason is always at the back of our minds, gnawing at our resolve when we approach religious practice. We are fortunate today in that we can choose to follow a religious path and aren't forced to do so, at least in the West. We know that no religion or human field of metaphysical enquiry has all the answers. We know this instinctively. But we align ourselves to the religion we have decided to follow. Easy in that this is voluntary (at least in my case) but incredibly difficult in a globalised, post-Christian world. How can we match the dogmas with the world around us? And in the case of Christianity- what Christianity are we following?

But the point I am trying to make is that sometimes we return to the beginning once we have sought the end. 

This isn't a journey from belief to disbelief. It's a journey towards a more nuanced form of belief. 
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